Call-In Classic Christianity Radio – Bob George P463 (8-09-19)
Synopsis
All of us are in continual need of replacing error with truth in our lives, and that will be true until the day we die. The real question is, “Do you want to get well?” That is why it is so good to hear people call in with their questions, for this is an avenue in which the body of Christ can be built up and grow. Many times people call to receive advice on how to deal with circumstances in their life that they do not know how to resolve. That is why we are placed in the body of Christ, to help and encourage one another. These are the questions asked by callers on the program. What do you think about a man and a woman living together who are not married? How come I cannot love like I want to love? How come I get bitter thoughts in my mind that I cannot seem to get rid? How do I parent a young college student who is not living right?
Julie called to ask Bob about his viewpoint on living with someone outside of marriage. Julie was rationalizing her sin of fornication, specifically called out in scripture as sinful behavior. We should never get to the point of calling something good that is bad, calling something other than what God calls it, which is sin. We may not be able to carry it out and that is why Christ came to dwell in you by His Spirit. But if you do not deal with what is true then how then can you change to live in the new way of the Spirit that God has called you to live as a born again believer? Bob explained what Jesus did to take away sin and was firm with her on truth, exhorting her to live in the new life God had called believers to live. While offering practical advice, that hopefully she will take to heart, she can choose to live in accordance with God’s best for her, a life of joy and peace, the fruit of the Spirit. She cannot experience that if she chooses to willfully live in sin. She has to make those choices to change her way of thinking.
At times, we can be harder on ourselves more than God, putting expectations on ourselves that we cannot carry out in the energy of the flesh. Such was the case with the question Brian called about. He was bothered by the fact he could not love as he ought. The swearing and ungodly behavior in the surroundings he is in, such as at the workplace, just gets to him that he just does not want to be around these kinds of people. Sometimes he feels like he wants to punch them in the face. He had been thinking about this verse.
Luke 6:32-33
32 “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. 33 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that.
Anyone who has tried to love like that, like someone who just gets under your skin by playing this raunchy music in your ear, with all kinds of cursing and disrespect and ungodly behavior, or simply cuts you off the freeway, nearly running you off the road, knows what his first reaction in the flesh is going to be. We never had it in us to love like this. God is love and Corinthians describes the love of God. Galatians 5:22-23 tells us what the fruit of the Spirit is, and that it comes from the Spirit of God.
1 Corinthians 13:4-5
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Galatians 5:22-23
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.
So what do we naturally do. If we do not first just want to hate the person, we feel guilty and then maybe try to love in the energy of the flesh and find ourselves falling flat on our face. That is also why we are under grace and not the law. This is the normal and natural human experience. But we cannot generate this love. Jesus explained to us how we are to function in the Spirit in John 15, when he explains the parable of the vine and the branches.
John 15:1-5
1 “I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. 2 He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. 3 You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. 4 Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.”5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
The flesh never wants to be kind to someone that gets under our skin. The flesh wants to get his own way. I cannot do that any more than a branch can produce fruit. It would be like saying, “You branch go out and love all the people in the world.“ The branch comes back and says, “I cannot do this.” God says, “I never intended you to do it. Your role as a branch is to abide in the vine and let the vine produce in you that you cannot do in and of yourself and you will bear the fruit of the vine but you cannot produce the fruit of the vine.” You and I cannot do it in the energy of the flesh.
We are in the process of being renewed in our minds to turn first to the Spirit when facing every day life situations. Will we ever function perfectly? No, but we learn to grow, even from our failures. We are reminded of our weakness so Christ’s power may be displayed through us. That is why Paul said, “I delight in my weaknesses that Christ’s power may rest on me. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
Sandra called to get advice on overcoming bitterness. She was expressing that she is having difficultly removing such thoughts from her mind. As believers, we are instructed to forgive one another, even as Christ has forgiven you. We are not to hold onto bitterness. We do not strive in the energy of the flesh to be a forgiving or loving person. No one controls the flesh that way. No, we walk by the Spirit and so act in accordance with the Spirit, in His forgiveness and love. Satan desires to keep you unfruitful, putting thoughts in your head such as reminding where you may have had bitterness toward someone else. Do not pay attention to it but instead redirect your efforts to pray for that person who had insulted or wronged you. You are a new creation, a spiritual being, with the spirit of Christ in you. So if Christ has forgiven Him, and He already has, then so have you.
Sandra called to get advice on how to parent a college age son who is not living right. She has evidence that he is viewing pornography and into wild partying involving alcohol. Bob replied first by saying he is no longer to be treated as a child anymore but as someone who is a grown adult and as a friend. Bob said to her, “No one loves you more than your mom except God.” Bob encouraged Sandra to look at her son that way and make an appeal based on love. Talk about God’s unconditional love for him. Bob offered this suggestion: “Son, look, you have got choices as a child of God to make any decisions you make, but when you choose to get in to alcohol that alters the mind and destroys the body, those are poor decisions. I come to you as a friend, not as a parent, for you are beyond parenting now. For your own good, let us reason together. As a parent who loves you, these decisions you are making are going to destroy you if you do not ultimately change your mind and start on a new path.” Unfortunately, many young people will not learn until they fall flat on their face. And it may take that for someone his age to come to his senses.
Transcript
Julie from Springfield, Oregon
Julie called to ask about living with someone outside of marriage. She says she believes she knows the answer to it. A woman who is living with someone else outside of marriage, and what are your views on it? And why are counselors so quiet about that? Julie, at first shares as if she was talking about some person in general but then admits that she is a woman who is living with someone outside of marriage and even that she has left and come back into that situation several times. She later confesses that her boyfriend says he loves Jesus and God but hates to talk about God. So in addition to fornication, she is unequally yoked with an unbeliever. She also is rationalizing her behavior. Bob confronts her with the truth, calling out her behavior for what it really is, sin. He does so in a matter of gentleness, yet firm with truth, with the intention to restore her to right living, where she can experience the peace and joy with God.
Bob warns about denying calling something is sin when God clearly says it is. She then agreed with Bob that the behavior she is doing is sin. But seeking to justify her behavior, she provides more information about her circumstances, such as being homeless. Bob did not give into her one moment. He remained gracious yet firm with truth. He instructed her to make the right choices in life, reminding her that she is in this situation because of wrong choices. Then, to respond to her excuses or fears of homelessness, he informed her that there are always other options. To help her to be willing to make right choices, he asked her: “Are you happy with your choices? Is what you are doing working for you?” Obviously she knows the answer to those questions or she would not be calling, willing to express her difficult situation. He reminds her that all sin has been placed on Jesus Christ and tells her that God wants her to be happy. But one cannot be happy living in sin. God is interested in you having peace and joy.
Bob tells her that when you are dealing with issues that are sin, then it is not a matter of someone’s view on it, but what the word of God says it is. Living with someone outside of marriage is fornication and God calls it sin. That is the truth of the matter.
1 Corinthians 6:18
18 Flee fornication. Every sin that a man does is outside the body; but he that commits fornication sins against his own body.
Also the truth of the matter is that the sin you are talking about was placed on Jesus Christ 2000 years ago at the cross, so him who knew no sin became sin for you, so that in the resurrection of Christ you can become the righteousness of God.
2 Corinthians 5:21
212 God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.
You never want to get to the point of denying what God says is true, that is calling what is bad good and what is good bad. Living together is not shacking up, not just saving expenses. Living together is sin. You call it what it is and then you just thank him for taking that sin away never to be seen again in the eyes of God so that you can walk in the newness of life.
Romans 6:4
4 We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.
God did not die for us just so that all are sins are forgiven but so that we walk in the newness of life, with the fruit of the Spirit, that he produces in you as you are willing to yield yourself to His control.
John 10:10
10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
Galatians 5:22-23
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.
Julie, have you come to the point where you have come to know Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior? Julie said she asked Jesus into her heart a long time ago. Julie then started rationalizing her sinful behavior by saying that following Jesus is very hard for her. She says that she just make choices that come, claiming there are no other options. Bob replied there are always other choices and told her that what she said is a cop out. Are you really happy with this arrangement? Don’t tell me you are happy for there is no way to be happy in that, living in sin willfully knowing it is wrong. God tells us not to do that because He wants the best for us. God wants us to have peace and joy and love and patience and kindness and goodness. All those things get hampered when you choose to willfully sin, choosing to sin when you know it is wrong. God wants the best for you. Recognize that fact and get out of it.
This is not doing any good for you or for the guy. He is probably feeling guilty as well. The two of you get together and agree to quit this. Does your boyfriend know the Lord? Julie replied, “He says he knows Jesus and God but he gets upset when I talk about God.” He is not saved then. No one is saved who gets angry talking about God. On top of fornication, you are also unequally yoked with a non-believer.
2 Corinthians 6:14
14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?
You need to get out of that relationship. You do not have to make a massive blow up over it. Just say, “I cannot continue to live this way, it is not good for me and it is not good for you, and we have to cut this off”. Just like Jesus told the woman caught in adultery, to go and sin no more. God is also telling you the same thing. Julie then said, “Will you remember me in prayer to do what I have to do?”
Absolutely. Bob then continued giving her needed instruction. You need to find a way to make a living. Julie, still trying to rationalize her behavior says, “But for the grace of God go I. In my church, one of the main reasons, I do these things is they tell you to take off, leave and don’t come back.” Julie then share that she keeps leaving and coming back to this man. She says she is living in a mission and that there is no alternative. Julie also said she has been homeless.
Julie is making excuses so Bob got more firm with her. The issue to me is this. There are places that take care of people who are homeless. What you have been believing and doing has not been working for you, has it? You have to realize that whatever you are doing is not working. What you believe is why you are living this way. The choices you have made are not correct. There are correct choices and there are ways to get jobs. If you are an alcoholic, then that has to come under the control of the Holy Spirit sooner or later in your life. You are a by product of your choices. Do you want to continue living as if your decisions are okay? Do you want to continue thinking that you are just living under those circumstances? Or do you want to change your way of thinking? You have to make up your mind that what you have been thinking and believing has not been working. You have to decide that you are going to change the way you have been thinking. You have to decide that you are going to get work and be a diligent worker, to work as unto the Lord and not unto men. There are shelters out there. I do not know if a pastor said to you not to come back to church, and if so, then that is not a good thing. For a church is a place for people like you. You have to go and get work. Be a waitress or whatever it might be. I hope this has helped you. If you need more help, then get back in touch with us.
Romans 6:6
6 Your old evil desires were nailed to the cross with him; that part of you that loves to sin was crushed and fatally wounded, so that your sin-loving body is no longer under sin’s control, no longer needs to be a slave to sin;
Colossians 3:23
Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters
Brian from San Diego, California
He recognizes he has an unloving attitude to other people. It concerns him. He has been thinking of this verse that he continually falls short on.
Luke 6:32-33
32 “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. 33 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that.
Brian said that when he looks at some people, he just wants to foam at the mouth. At times, he says he prays God removes this from him. At other times, he just does not want to be with them. He also has struggles with his thought life. Rap music blasting with profanity on a bus just gets to him.
Brian, you are a human being and so am I. If you could have heard what I am thinking when I hear this awful music from the pit of hell. So if you knew what I was thinking, you would not be listening to me on the air.
1 Corinthians 13:4-5
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Galatians 5:22-23
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.
When you are looking at God’s love from Corinthians, God’s love is patient and kind. I may not like that person but I am to be kind to him. I may not want to be around him but I do not want to keep records of his wrongs. All those kinds of things has to be something that God has to produce in you and through you.
The flesh never wants to be kind to someone that gets under our skin. The flesh wants to get his own way. I cannot do that any more than a branch can produce fruit. It would be like saying, “You branch go out and love all the people in the world.“ The branch comes back and says, “I cannot do this.” God says, “I never intended you to do it. Your role as a branch is to abide in the vine and let the vine produce in you that you cannot do in and of yourself and you will bear the fruit of the vine but you cannot produce the fruit of the vine.” You and I cannot do it in the energy of the flesh.
John 15:1-5
1 “I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. 2 He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. 3 You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. 4 Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.”5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
First comes the natural and then the spiritual. When my car is vibrating because of some pinhead with radio blasting, I do not know how they lose their hearing, but I praise Jesus if something does not come out of my mouth back at him. God says, “You do not need to be irritated. In a moment he will have driven away.” You want to be loving but you cannot produce that love. You have to have Jesus produce that through you.
Sandra from San Diego, California
She is struggling with bitterness. She is a believer for over 20 years. Recently she sees a bitter root in her. When it comes it is very strong. What do I do to come against that. She is in a battle field in this area.
When something comes upon you. If bitterness wasn’t in you it wouldn’t come out of you. Circumstances do not cause your nature. They reveal your nature. You cannot store beans in a pot unless beans are in there. Unless you can have the spirit of bitterness in you, you cannot let it out of you. Circumstances just reveal that.
Mark 7:15
15 Nothing outside a person can defile them by going into them. Rather, it is what comes out of a person that defiles them.
You can have a spirit of bitterness because you are bitter over something. And when you are bitter over something you are hanging onto it too long. If someone insults you, then it is only important as long as you insist on remembering it. You have to let go of these things. They are not important. In light of eternity just how important is it when somebody insults you. Putting things in proper perspective. If bitterness is there, all it takes is a little thought and it will get triggered. So just get rid of the bitterness. It is not worth thinking about. Start praying for the person who is bitter.
Ephesians 4:30-32
30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Matthew 5:43-45
43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ 44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.”
You may be over this. Satan is activating those thoughts. Bob relates how he had been in a situation where he found it very difficult to forgive. What he had to realize is that he could not forgive in his flesh. What he was trying to do was to manufacture up fleshly forgiveness. There is nothing good in the flesh.
Romans 7:20
20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.
Romans 8:1-8
1 Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, 2 because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death. 3 For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in the flesh, 4 in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.5 Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. 6 The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. 7 The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. 8 Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.
The flesh never wants to forgive. The Spirit in me has already forgiven him. This flesh is not going anywhere except the grave. I am in Christ, and I am a spiritual being, and since Christ forgave him so do I. In the Spirit, you forgive. Satan is just triggering your flesh. Satan, you might as well talk to someone else. I am not interested in entertaining that thought anymore. Satan wants you to waste your time and he is the one who is bringing those thoughts back to your mind.
2 Corinthians 10:5
5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
John 10:10
10 The thief [Satan] comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I [Jesus] have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
Donna from Nashville, Tennessee
She was a first time caller. She called to get guidance in how to parent her 18 year old son. He is making bad decisions in relations, and she has evidence he is visiting porn sites, and has confronted him about that. She was trying to speak truth in love and not provoke wrath in him. She is having a hard time in transitioning in parenting him as a young adult and not as a child.
When a child that old, a freshman in college, if he does not have a foundation now, then he has to get his own foundation somehow. He may have to fall on his face to get a foundation. Today, so many young men get into college and get caught up in wild living and drinking, going down to those beaches, and especially men acting like morons and idiots. It is strange to think these young men are the hope of the world acting like that and yet getting interviews upon graduation. These were guys drunk on a beach.
It is a good thing God has to get a hold of us sooner or later. You are in college to get educated but what you really need educated on is how to live. Bob asked, “Are all of you Christians? Does he know the Lord?” Yes, she said. This is the advice Bob told her.
Son, look, you have got choices as a child of God to make any decisions you make, but when you choose to get in to alcohol that alters the mind and destroys the body, those are poor decisions. I come to you as a friend not as a parent for you are beyond parenting now. For your own good, let us reason together. As a parent who loves you, these decisions you are making are going to destroy you if you do not ultimately change your mind and start on a new path.
Bob then asks Julie how long has this behavior been going on. She tells Bob that in high school he was a little rebellious at 16 but at 17 he got more rebellious. When you let kids have liberty in high school then they have a place to come home to. In high school, you have a place to learn these things of life. Let your kids have enough liberty that when they fall on their face, then there is a safe place to come home to and receive guidance as well as unconditional love.
Bob then encourages her in reaching her son, and offers suggestion of what to say. “There is no one going to love you any more than your mom. I am not coming here to chastise you. I am not parenting you anymore. You are beyond that. You seem like you are lost and like you do not know where you are going. I want to talk to you as a friend. I am talking to you as a friend who cares for you.” Do not get shocked by it. Just keep talking to him about the love of God and how much He loves him.
