Call-In Classic Christianity Radio – Bob George P407 (11-22-19)
Welcome to Classic Christianity Radio with Bob George. Let’s now join Bob George as he offers practical biblical insights as he helps people experience faith, hope and love in Jesus Christ.
Bob answered a call from Rick who was struggling with acceptance from his father. He was experiencing all kinds of critical remarks and belittling from his father and his response was one of anger. He called to get help in dealing with that anger. Bob, through many years in ministry, said that he hears this often from sons who have never heard a single compliment from their father. Bob himself testified that you would not believe the number of rejection and hate letters he receives that he has thrown in the trash over the years he has been in ministry. Bob directs people’s attention to the unconditional love and acceptance with God, that perfect love that casts out fear, and the passage in Ephesians 3 to grasp the love of God, to know the acceptance and approval that comes from God, and how much God is for you from the passage in Romans 8:31-32. You really have to let go of the fear of rejection or ever receiving approval and acceptance from people by abiding in God’s amazing love and replace anger you feel with pity for the one who does not understand God’s love. You may even need to confront someone to not call if the only reason to call is to say damaging and hurtful words to you. You may need to stop sharing anymore with them and let God do His work since you have already shared enough with them and they are not responding to that truth. Bob also referred people who are struggling with anger to a book he wrote titled, “Anger, Fear in Disguise“.
Rick listened to a “Battle for Control” series by Bob where he learned that the opposite of agape love is pride and that pride often manifests itself through control and condemnation. He says he has a real anger problem with a relationship with his father. His father recovered from cancer but is controlling and condemning and saying things like “You did not do anything good in your life and now doing this bible stuff. Money is his God and he rejects me.” Rick repeated the scripture, “Don’t let sun go on down on your anger” yet he find himself all tied up at night after getting off the phone with his dad. Rick is really struggling in how to deal with such anger.
When Bob first went into full time Christian work, none of his family understood him. His mother was angry when he said he wanted to be baptized. You were baptized when you were young. All in his family later came to Christ but in those early days none of his family understood him. Bob said he did not experience anger but rather felt pity for them that they could not see and understand the one who came to save them.
You are angry because you want acceptance so bad, especially from your Father. The main thing our sons want is our acceptance. Many times we want our sons to live like they would have liked to have done when they were children. How common Bob has heard in ministry of a son who never once heard a complement from his father. When we don’t get acceptance from our father, we get anger. But that anger has to be turned to pity. It is sad for a Father to belittle his son who says he has a relationship with God. When Bob was not a believer he recalls an event in life of someone who was a born again believer. This man, with military background, had a habit of buffing everyone’s beds and never saying a word about it. The drill sergeant had problems. One day, he threw the man’s bible down and said he would be better off taking up a sword. Bob, not a believer at the time, recalls getting real angry with that. Looking back on that he has pity on such people.
Recall Jesus response to those people standing there while he was dying on a cross through no sin of his own, for had none.
Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”
Realize that the acceptance you want from your father you can get from your real dad, which is God.
Rick relates the background of his father. His father was an illegitimate son and here were a number of suicides in his family line. Rick thinks that possibly he is living out what his father did with him. It seems that many characteristics, or patterns of the flesh, we see in our parents shows itself in us.
Rick mentioned the following scriptures.
26 “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold.
As a man thinks so he is.
Rick is expressing that if he is going to think hateful and murderous thoughts then he is going to be a hate-filled murderer. He said this in a light tone but he certainly does not want that attitude of murder, which hate is, to take root in his heart.
Bob referred him to booklet he wrote titled : “Anger, Fear in Disguise”.
Bob shares that anger is a secondary response to fear. Men don’t like to admit having fear but will admit they have anger. A person will have fear of continual rejection that his dad will never accept or approve of him. The only solution to fear, the root of the anger, is the perfect love of God. No other solution. Perfect love casts out fear. Fear cast out perfect love. So we need to learn to abide in God’s love.
6 I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18 may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
To be filled with the full measure of God takes the power of God at work within you. It takes power to grasp the love of God. So the real need is to be controlled by love of God.
As one ponders over this scripture, you will begin to see the situation from a brand new perspective.
31 What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?
Yes, we all would like to get the approval of our father. Yet, even if we got all the approval of the world, there are people who are still not happy if they are not deriving their approval from God. Put aside those attitudes that I have to respond in anger. Learn to replace those thoughts from the flesh. For example, say “My dad needs help. He is in a pitiful situation, and not happy in his own being. I am not going to let that affect me. My God is for me and if my God is for me who can be against me. I can be separate from other people’s love but nothing can separate me from the love of God.” Let the word of truth dwell in you to tear down strongholds of the flesh.
2 Corinthians 10:5
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
Bob relates that for as long as he has been in ministry, he testifies that you will have rejection. He says that it is amazing how many hate letters and accusations he has received that he had to throw in the trash can.
Rick shared his own thoughts from psychology, and how Zoloft and Prolof are often prescribed to alter the mind. Rick then relates more about the nature of his father. His dad gets into self pity and blames the world for everything. The pursuit of wealth is what he has substituted for enjoyment. Hen Rick states that he also has the tendency to get into a pity party. He states that in his own power, he cannot overcome his patterns of the flesh.
Then Rick asked specific questions to Bob. “What is your first action when you hear such harsh words from others? Do we have to stand our ground? Since we are a redeemed person, that doesn’t mean we should just roll over and take abuse?”
Bob suggested this response. “Look dad, I don’t know what problems you went through life. I wish I did so I could be sympathetic toward it. But what I do know is that I have no intention sitting here listening to someone led by Satan to beat the daylights out of me. If that is what you want to do when you call, then call someone else. Then I do not want to hear from you. If you want to call and be loving and nice then I would love to hear from you.”
Rick shares a typical conversation with his father. “I have been religious all my life. Would you like to read the bible”. His father responds in a manner like this. “I am too busy to run company A, B and C.” Rick says his father thinks that the good outweighs the bad and sees himself as pretty nice and that his father gets upset with him.
Bob advised. “I would quit telling him. You have said all you can say to him and leave it there. If he dies without Jesus then you will not see him in heaven. If he dies with Jesus, you will. But you have already told him and leave it there. Let God does His work.”
Jill from Dallas, TX
She has been to Bob George ministry for over 13 years and gets encouragement from that. She shared many personal struggles that Bob had a hard time sorting out on the air for she discussed so many things, and was quite emotional about it. She was definitely feeling rejection from family and church. I am not sure how she got into the situation where she is a single parent for she did not explain that on the air but that seemed to be the source of the rejection from others from what she shared in regards to their reaction to her situation. She says she is hearing gossip about her and has struggles with own family members accepting her. She says everything she has tried to get help has backfired on her and no longer believes she can get help from church either, for she said the counseling she received was not helpful. She obviously needed counseling so Bob referred her to Bob Heck, a counselor with what was formerly known as People to People ministries in those days.